Radiokommunikasjon! Morsom greie.. :-)

[Freddy Ulvseth]

Funnet på nettet; vistnok ting som skal ha blitt sagt "på lufta":

 

=========================

Tower: "Delta 351, you have traffic at 10 o'clock, 6 miles!"

Delta 351: "Give us another hint! We have digital watches!"

========================

"TWA 2341, for noise abatement turn right 45 Degrees."

"Center, we are at 35,000 feet. How much noise can we make up here?"

"Sir, have you ever heard the noise a 747 makes when it hits a 727?"

=========================

From an unknown aircraft waiting in a very long takeoff queue: "I'm

f...ing bored!"

Ground Traffic Control: "Last aircraft transmitting, identify yourself

immediately!"

Unknown aircraft: "I said I was f...ing bored, not f....ing stupid!"

=========================

O'Hare Approach Control to a 747: "United 329 heavy, your traffic is a

Fokker, one o'clock, three miles, Eastbound."

United 239: "Approach, I've always wanted to say this... I've got the

little Fokker in sight."

=========================

A student became lost during a solo cross-country flight. While

attempting to locate the aircraft on radar, ATC asked, "What was your

last known position?"

Student: "When I was number one for takeoff."

=========================

A DC-10 had come in a little hot and thus had an exceedingly long roll

out after touching down.

San Jose Tower Noted: "American 751, make a hard right turn at the end

of the runway, if you are able. If you are not able, take the Guadeloupe

exit off Highway 101, make a right at the lights and return to the

airport."

=========================

Taxiing down the tarmac, a DC-10 abruptly stopped, turned around and

returned to the gate. After an hour-long wait, it finally took off. A

concerned passenger asked the flight attendant, "What, exactly, was the

problem?" "The pilot was bothered by a noise he heard in the engine,"

explained the flight attendant. "It took us a while to find a new

pilot."

=========================

A Pan Am 727 flight waiting for start clearance in Munich overheard the

following:

Lufthansa (in German): "Ground, what is our start clearance time?"

Ground (in English): "If you want an answer you must speak in English."

Lufthansa (in English): "I am a German, flying a German airplane, in

Germany. Why must I speak in English?

Unknown voice from another plane (in a beautiful British accent):

"Because you lost the bloody war."

========================

Tower: "Eastern 702, cleared for takeoff, contact Departure on frequency

124.7"

Eastern 702: "Tower, Eastern 702 switching to Departure. By the way,

after we lifted off we saw some kind of dead animal on the far end of

the runway."

Tower: "Continental 635, cleared for takeoff behind Eastern 702, contact

Departure on frequency 124.7. Did you copy that report from Eastern

702?"

Continental 635: "Continental 635, cleared for takeoff, roger; and yes,

we copied Eastern... we've already notified our caterers."

========================

One day the pilot of a Cherokee 180 was told by the tower to hold short

of the active runway while a DC-8 landed. The DC-8 landed, rolled out,

turned around, and taxied back past the Cherokee. Some quick witted

comedian in the DC-8 crew got on the radio and said, "What a cute little

plane. Did you make it all by yourself?"

The Cherokee pilot, not about to let the insult go by, came back with a

real zinger: "I made it out of DC-8 parts. Another landing like yours

and I'll have enough parts for another one."

========================

While taxiing at London's Gatwick Airport, the crew of a US Air flight

departing for Ft. Lauderdale made a wrong turn and came nose to nose

with a United 727. An irate female ground controller lashed out at the

US Air crew, screaming: "US Air 2771, where the hell are you going?! I

told you to turn right onto Charlie taxiway! You turned right on Delta!

Stop right there. I know it's difficult for you to tell the difference

between C and D, but get it right!" Continuing her rage to the

embarrassed crew, she was now shouting hysterically: "God! Now you've

screwed everything up! It'll take forever to sort this out! You stay

right there and don't move till I tell you to! You can expect

progressive taxi instructions in about half an hour and I want you to go

exactly where I tell you, when I tell you, and how I tell you! You got

that, US Air 2771?"

"Yes, ma'am," the humbled crew responded. Naturally, the ground control

communications frequency fell terribly silent after the verbal bashing

of US Air 2771. Nobody wanted to chance engaging the irate ground

controller in her current state of mind. Tension in every cockpit out

around Gatwick was definitely running high. Just then an unknown pilot

broke the silence and keyed his microphone, asking: "Wasn't I married to

you once?"

 

Noen som har noen flere slike?

Holdt på å dø av latter noen ganger... hehe...

[Stian Haukland]

LOL

[Thomas Ericsson]

Hehe, nr.8 var kul

[Sindre Grut Hilstad]

Slettes ikke verst...

[Nicklas Bak Pedersen]

Her er nogle flere

[Magnus Wiik]

Den siste der har vel vært oppe før?

[Øyvind Grassdal]

HA HA. Likte nr.8 ja...